Calamity of Errors

It’s been a busy week.

I had a friend visiting from out of town and we spent a few days down at the Elbow playing $15/30. I know I talked about this in my last entry but it’s amazing how bad these guys play. Really dumb founding. My friend didn’t have very good luck though, which sucks since he’s been running badly for almost a year.

So, we’re playing late Wednesday night and I’m getting pretty sleepy. I’m in the number two seat and my friend is in the number four seat. Since I’m tired I’m only paying half attention to the game so I muck and see my friend 3-bet this lady who’s between us and playing like a maniac (although she plays decent post flop in a weird way). My friend is the cut off (button – 1) and after the button calls 3 cold (big donkey), the small blind calls 3 cold (drunken donkey) as well. Because he’s drunk the small blind has a few problems getting his chips out. He’s also sitting in the number six seat, which is directly opposite the dealer. The dealer kind of helps him get his chips straightened out then finishes directing action around the table. This is getting to be a big pot.

The action finishes and the dealer collects the chips and brings them into the middle of the table. Then he looks through his 1-inch thick spectacles with a dumbfounded look and says to the small blind, “You don’t have any cards.”

Surprised, the small blind looks down and sure enough his cards have vanished. “Umm…. What the fuck?”

“The dealer scooped them up when he pulled your chips in,” I say, knowing full well that I just opened up a can of worms.

“No, I did not!” the stupid dealer says incredulously.

“Yes, you did,” I reply matter of factly. This silly banter goes on for a little while with my poor friend trying to play his hand saying, “It doesn’t matter, the hand is dead, let’s get going!”

Of course, my friend is right. The SB’s cards have touched the muck (the discards) and is dead. This is a universal rule in any and all card rooms. In this case, not only has the hand touched the muck, but it is buried in their and is irretrievable. In all cases like these the pit boss is called over to make a ruling, and there is only one ruling that he can make, the hand is dead. Instead, he asks the players in the hand if the SB can have his money back out of the pot. Huh? WTF? Sigh…here we go. Those were probably my exact thoughts when this happened.

So, two players agree and the pit boss asks my friend to which he responds, “Just make your ruling, whatever you decide.”

“Ok, then, the money stays in the pot. This guy doesn’t want to give it back.”

“What? Buddy, don’t make me out to be the bad guy. Take responsibility and do your job – make the ruling.”

Taken aback a little the sheepish young pit boss tries futilely to console my friend who wants none of it. The hand plays out, and I forget the result of it but the pit boss continues to try and make amends with my friend but he isn’t really the forgiving type when he’s been wronged and it doesn’t work out. The pit boss kind of skulks away, a little ashamed of himself.

Trouble has a way of finding my friend and this night was going to be no different. After the above incident happens my friend is involved in another pot and is simply calling a bet, but after having a bad day he is frustrated and in this specific hand he decides to call by dropping one chip at a time on the table. Click, click, click, click, click the chips hit the table and when it’s done the dealer looks over and says, “Don’t do that.”

“I can’t call like that?”

“No.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really.”

“Sigh…”

A few hours later, my friend has quit the game and I’m finishing up my hands when they bring the late night food out. I rack up and cash out and get in line to get my food. It’s put on the counter in this little horseshoe shaped kitchen. My friend gets a plate and the first food in the line is the cookies. The line is pretty slow moving so when my friend gets a cookie he begins to eat it, because it’s like 4am and he’s hungry and the line is slow. Tap, tap, tap. My friend turns around and the security guard says to him, “You can’t eat that here.”

“Pardon me?”

“You can’t eat that here.”

Chomp, chomp, chomp.

We have a little laugh, eat our food and then I get him another cookie as we leave for the evening. BTW, +$350 for the evening. So far, playing live, I’ve booked 14.5 hours and have won $1313 including the $100 I donked off in the prop bet. Not bad for 3 days work.